It's just after midnight, Tuesday night. I spoke with Lisa a few hours ago. On Monday, she was moved out of the “warm-room” I wrote about a few days ago. They needed it for someone else.
It was wonderful to talk to her. I could hear the smile in her voice. Is it wrong to just end this blog entry with a series of little smilies? You know, like this >> :) :) :) :)
This will be my last blog entry. I didn't discuss this with her but, this will be my last post. Tomorrow Lisa will be discharged.
:) :) :) :) :}
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
From Chris ...
Earlier tonight, I spoke to Chris who has opened up her home to Lisa and I during our recent stays in Vancouver. Chris, is one of the TITS. The only one that does not live in PG. Since Lisa went into surgery on Friday, Chris and I have had many conversations about life, love, relationships and friendships and, of course, Lisa. Actually, it was more like one long-running three-day discussion punctuated by time on the blog, phone calls, sleep, and getting ready to see Lisa, only 15 minutes away. Oh, yes, we ate too :)
I asked Chris to send me something that I could post here ‘in her words’. Lisa is not the first close friend that Chris has supported through breast cancer. In fact, during a brief escape from the hospital on the day of Lisa’s surgery, Chris learned that yet another friend had tested positive for the disease. I’m certain that Chris could drive to VGH blind-folded.
Chris emailed me back with some thoughts straight from the heart. Anyone, who has “experienced” cancer in their life time will be familiar with the underlying emotions in her voice.
From Chris ..
I took Norm to the airport this morning; he has been here since before her surgery but must return to work. After dropping him off I drove straight to VGH to visit Lisa. She was awake and glad to see me. It’s day three post-op. She’s had a decent night’s sleep and has found her sunny smile again.
Lisa is healing well but it’s a slow road. Last night she phoned her 8 year old daughter to wish her good-night. Keeping it together on the phone took everything she had.
Cancer is painful. You walk in to surgery with no pain or symptom and you wake up feeling terrible, only to hold your breath until you learn about what ‘they’ in the medical field want to do to you to prevent it from spreading. It’s especially hard to endure, you wish you were dead.
Lisa is 42, she teaches high-school. Special Ed. She’s also working towards her Masters degree – she should complete it in July. She is beautiful. She looks a bit like Sandra Bullock. She has risen to every challenge [and she has had more than her share] with dignity.
She is my friend and I am exactly where I need to be.
I asked Chris to send me something that I could post here ‘in her words’. Lisa is not the first close friend that Chris has supported through breast cancer. In fact, during a brief escape from the hospital on the day of Lisa’s surgery, Chris learned that yet another friend had tested positive for the disease. I’m certain that Chris could drive to VGH blind-folded.
Chris emailed me back with some thoughts straight from the heart. Anyone, who has “experienced” cancer in their life time will be familiar with the underlying emotions in her voice.
From Chris ..
I took Norm to the airport this morning; he has been here since before her surgery but must return to work. After dropping him off I drove straight to VGH to visit Lisa. She was awake and glad to see me. It’s day three post-op. She’s had a decent night’s sleep and has found her sunny smile again.
Lisa is healing well but it’s a slow road. Last night she phoned her 8 year old daughter to wish her good-night. Keeping it together on the phone took everything she had.
Cancer is painful. You walk in to surgery with no pain or symptom and you wake up feeling terrible, only to hold your breath until you learn about what ‘they’ in the medical field want to do to you to prevent it from spreading. It’s especially hard to endure, you wish you were dead.
Lisa is 42, she teaches high-school. Special Ed. She’s also working towards her Masters degree – she should complete it in July. She is beautiful. She looks a bit like Sandra Bullock. She has risen to every challenge [and she has had more than her share] with dignity.
She is my friend and I am exactly where I need to be.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Overwhelming ...
I'm off to Toronto in the morning, and wanted to take an opportunity to thank you for the prayers, white-light and supportive thoughts. The support that you've shown Lisa has been incredibly, um, overwhelming - I'm looking for a better word but nothing else springs to mind.
I also wanted to give some perspective to Lisa's decision to start this blog. In my estimation, it started from a discussion that took place soon after her diagnosis. Our conversation focused on how so many people look away when discussing cancer, or quickly try to change the subject. While they may have reasons for doing so, they don't realize that in an instant they've let the disease define the person.
I remember Lisa pointing out that she's not the first woman with cancer, nor is she the first woman to require chemo or radiation. (Note: It will be 10-12 days before we find out what the next steps are.) From the beginning, she was insistent on being there for her "peeps", especially me. By keeping her life, more or less normal, she felt could stay on top of her stress. She's done a remarkable job.
When word of her cancer hit the word-of-mouth express, Lisa was inundated with emails. I watched one evening as she worked diligently to answer them all personally. When she was completed, she was exhausted. It was then that we discussed the idea of the blog. It was a brief exchange but it obviously stuck with her.
The idea of wearing pink came after a few exchanges with friends. Like all good friends, they offered to help Lisa with "anything". Lisa typically responded with a request for people to wear pink on the day of her surgery. In her wildest dreams though, she couldn't have anticipated the support that has poured in from, quite literally, all across the country. I thank you for making the woman I love understand just how special she is. Earlier tonight, she saw all the pics you've sent in and she cried.
She was overwhelmed.
There's that word again.
This has been a real-life 'pay-it-forward' experience that I will never forget.
I also wanted to give some perspective to Lisa's decision to start this blog. In my estimation, it started from a discussion that took place soon after her diagnosis. Our conversation focused on how so many people look away when discussing cancer, or quickly try to change the subject. While they may have reasons for doing so, they don't realize that in an instant they've let the disease define the person.
I remember Lisa pointing out that she's not the first woman with cancer, nor is she the first woman to require chemo or radiation. (Note: It will be 10-12 days before we find out what the next steps are.) From the beginning, she was insistent on being there for her "peeps", especially me. By keeping her life, more or less normal, she felt could stay on top of her stress. She's done a remarkable job.
When word of her cancer hit the word-of-mouth express, Lisa was inundated with emails. I watched one evening as she worked diligently to answer them all personally. When she was completed, she was exhausted. It was then that we discussed the idea of the blog. It was a brief exchange but it obviously stuck with her.
The idea of wearing pink came after a few exchanges with friends. Like all good friends, they offered to help Lisa with "anything". Lisa typically responded with a request for people to wear pink on the day of her surgery. In her wildest dreams though, she couldn't have anticipated the support that has poured in from, quite literally, all across the country. I thank you for making the woman I love understand just how special she is. Earlier tonight, she saw all the pics you've sent in and she cried.
She was overwhelmed.
There's that word again.
This has been a real-life 'pay-it-forward' experience that I will never forget.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
She's ba-a-a-a-a-c-c-k ...
A quick blog entry this time. Today is my last day in Vancouver for a few days so we've some running around to do before days-end. Tomorrow, I'm heading off to the "centre of the universe" aka Toronto - apologies to my Toronto friends but, after all, your airport DID stamp my passport during my last visit. I return Friday afternoon and, if Lisa stays on sched, she'll be recouping with Chris by that time. I'll add more later.
Chris and I visited Lisa this morning to find her sitting up in bed giving herself a sponge bath. Her eyes were wide open and her grin ear-to-ear, "Hi, you arrived just in time to wash my back!". To see that familiar look on her face was, simply, amazing.
Some highlights from today's visit: the incubator get's unplugged this afternoon (no more umbrellas in her water glass) ; she had salisbury steak for lunch (yippee); she was, awake, alert, in good humor and was able to stand for a bit; she's in very little pain and not taking a lot of pain meds. Feeling cheeky, she announced that she "felt like running a marathon".
She's ba-a-a-a-a-c-c-k ...
It's gettin' better all the time ...
It’s just after 11pm and I’ve returned from the “warm room” at VGH. Tonight was my third visit of the day. The second visit was short because, well, Lisa was snoring away and obviously relieved to have the nausea of the morning behind her. Okay, don’t tell her about the snoring, we can keep it our little secret.
I was in the room for about five minutes when the nurse, Yola, ( In my head I was singing L-O-L-A … those of you who are over 40 will know the song by The Kinks) stopped in to introduced herself. As Lisa slept, Yola explained that in her job she is tasked to four patients at a time while on shift. She went on to let me know how Lisa’s care would progress over the days to come.
Lisa, is progressing well. Very well. Her spirits are good. At 5pm, four hours ahead of schedule, Lisa started having water and broth. For those of you who have had surgery, you’ll recognize this as a major milestone in recovery. Tomorrow, she’ll be able to have heavier liquids such as milk and porridge. Soon after that she’ll be able to have some of that great food that hospitals are known for J
Yola also told me that the incubator is to be turned off tomorrow. When I told Lisa, she looked so relieved. Just this afternoon they mentioned that the incubator could be on for as long as five days. Tomorrow night, hopefully, she’ll have a much better sleep.
- Norm
PS: I’ve downloaded about 50 pictures so far. Keep ‘em comin, won’t you? The support for Lisa has been, simply, overwhelming. I’ll work more on the pics tomorrow. Now, I need some sleep.
I was in the room for about five minutes when the nurse, Yola, ( In my head I was singing L-O-L-A … those of you who are over 40 will know the song by The Kinks) stopped in to introduced herself. As Lisa slept, Yola explained that in her job she is tasked to four patients at a time while on shift. She went on to let me know how Lisa’s care would progress over the days to come.
Lisa, is progressing well. Very well. Her spirits are good. At 5pm, four hours ahead of schedule, Lisa started having water and broth. For those of you who have had surgery, you’ll recognize this as a major milestone in recovery. Tomorrow, she’ll be able to have heavier liquids such as milk and porridge. Soon after that she’ll be able to have some of that great food that hospitals are known for J
Yola also told me that the incubator is to be turned off tomorrow. When I told Lisa, she looked so relieved. Just this afternoon they mentioned that the incubator could be on for as long as five days. Tomorrow night, hopefully, she’ll have a much better sleep.
- Norm
PS: I’ve downloaded about 50 pictures so far. Keep ‘em comin, won’t you? The support for Lisa has been, simply, overwhelming. I’ll work more on the pics tomorrow. Now, I need some sleep.
Saturday, April 26, 2008
The first post-op visit (nothing like how it’s portrayed in the movies) ….
Nope, it’s not like the movies at all. In the movies, the nurses would have let me in last night when I played the loving husband card. By the way, my name has changed to Mr. Norm Norman. (Heavy on the 'Mister' thank-you.)
We arrived this morning unsure of what we might find when we arrived. After all, this was our first post-op visit. Going in, Chris and I discussed that Lisa likely wouldn’t “be” herself. After a 15 hour surgery we weren’t sure if she’d be awake or not.
Lisa is staying in the Burns, Plastic and Trauma Unit, or BPTU. Even during visiting hours, the door is locked. We speak to the intercom and a nurse, on the other side of the door, buzzes us in. “Lisa Norman? Yes, come in and be sure to wash your hands before proceeding.” At VGH, you can’t walk 30 feet without passing a waterless soap dispenser. In the BPTU, washing the hands on the way in and on the way out is mandatory and cell phones are to be powered down.
We encounter the nurse’s station, and are directed onward to a second unit further on. A friendly face directs us to Room 11, which has a notice on the door - “Warm Room”.
Lisa’s room is smokin’ hot. No kidding. This is deliberate, however. The post-op rationale is that the tropical temperature is essential for promoting and maintaining good blood flow to the “girls”, as Lisa would put it.
We arrive to find Lisa surprisingly lucid, sweating, and in obvious distress. “I’m nauseous and I’m hot. I mean, look at this?” Her eyes look upward but I haven’t yet taken the room in. As I lean in, I bump into the very thing she’s referring to: a large incubator (okay, there’s likely a better name for it), mounted on wheels, has been pushed to her bedside. The heating panel, white in color and about 18” x 3’ arches over the bed. It’s thermostatically controlled to keep Lisa’s skin temperature at 33 degrees.
I looked at Chris, Lisa was so very uncomfortable. During our visit, the anesthesiologist dropped into pay her a visit and discuss her pain requirements. Lisa said that she was sore but, more than anything, she was hot. “There’s hot and then there’s ridiculous!!” She was cranky, she had every right. Lack of sleep, nausea, thirst (she wasn’t allowed fluids at that point) can do that to a person.
More in a bit ...
We arrived this morning unsure of what we might find when we arrived. After all, this was our first post-op visit. Going in, Chris and I discussed that Lisa likely wouldn’t “be” herself. After a 15 hour surgery we weren’t sure if she’d be awake or not.
Lisa is staying in the Burns, Plastic and Trauma Unit, or BPTU. Even during visiting hours, the door is locked. We speak to the intercom and a nurse, on the other side of the door, buzzes us in. “Lisa Norman? Yes, come in and be sure to wash your hands before proceeding.” At VGH, you can’t walk 30 feet without passing a waterless soap dispenser. In the BPTU, washing the hands on the way in and on the way out is mandatory and cell phones are to be powered down.
We encounter the nurse’s station, and are directed onward to a second unit further on. A friendly face directs us to Room 11, which has a notice on the door - “Warm Room”.
Lisa’s room is smokin’ hot. No kidding. This is deliberate, however. The post-op rationale is that the tropical temperature is essential for promoting and maintaining good blood flow to the “girls”, as Lisa would put it.
We arrive to find Lisa surprisingly lucid, sweating, and in obvious distress. “I’m nauseous and I’m hot. I mean, look at this?” Her eyes look upward but I haven’t yet taken the room in. As I lean in, I bump into the very thing she’s referring to: a large incubator (okay, there’s likely a better name for it), mounted on wheels, has been pushed to her bedside. The heating panel, white in color and about 18” x 3’ arches over the bed. It’s thermostatically controlled to keep Lisa’s skin temperature at 33 degrees.
I looked at Chris, Lisa was so very uncomfortable. During our visit, the anesthesiologist dropped into pay her a visit and discuss her pain requirements. Lisa said that she was sore but, more than anything, she was hot. “There’s hot and then there’s ridiculous!!” She was cranky, she had every right. Lack of sleep, nausea, thirst (she wasn’t allowed fluids at that point) can do that to a person.
More in a bit ...
The importance of the network ...
Finally, I've gained access to the blogsite. Groggy from surgery, Lisa still was able to roll her eyes and give me the password with one of those 'you weren't listening' looks. If you know Lisa, you know that she's a master of a million expressions. Even in post-op, she still has it. I'll save my post-op comments for later because I don't want to get ahead of myself.
Since her diagnosis, Lisa understood just how important having a "team" would be in her care. Literally, millions of words have been written in hundreds of books that speak to the importance of the team. However, despite all that literary effort the point is largely missed.
The team is important but not for the reasons you might think. The team is NOT important for coping with cancer. (Okay, settle down, I'm making a point.) Nope, dealing with the cancer is the easy part. The team is important for dealing with those who have chosen to work in the medical field. If you're a medical receptionist, read along, I have plenty of say and I don't really care much at this point about the security-guy at the end of the hallway.
Lisa has navigated this journey with amazing dignity and grace and, of course, with optimism. I admire this quality in her. I simply don't possess her tact in dealing with the dismissals of receptionists who have treated her as a nuisance rather than a person in need. Remember, Loni Anderson in WKRP? No platinum-blonde, high heels or emery board here. Just dis-interest.
Consider the following episodes:
** When Lisa was told that she had bilateral breast cancer, she was all alone. She entered the meeting feeling upbeat and positive because, a week before, the same Doc assured her that if the news wasn't positive he'd suggest that she bring someone along. When she received the call to review her pathology results, she felt good about things. After all, they hadn't suggested that she bring someone with her. What a setup! When she left the office, they comforted her by shaking their head and commenting about "how strong" she was. What a strong woman.
** Over the course of a few days, Lisa played a long-game of telephone tag with the oncologist in Vancouver who'd agreed to take her on as a patient. At one point, the receptionist told Lisa that "just because you've read the Doctor's book, you don't get a referral!". Demonstrating the same poise, Lisa secured the meeting-time that she sought and learned, along the way, that the young receptionist was a temp-employee! Apparently, in this business of medicine, there is an apprenticeship program in place and mastering rudeness is critical to securing full-time employment.
** Earlier the same month, Lisa met a PG-graduate from the same apprenticeship program working for her local Doc. All she needed was a signature on a referral form from her local Doc in PG in order to pave the way to see the oncologist in Vancouver. When she visited the Docs office the waiting room was empty. Lisa was told that she'd have to wait because the Doc was busy with patients. (Did I mention the waiting room was empty?) The receptionist then questioned the efficacy of the out-of-town referral because "we don't even know this Doctor" and was in the middle of reiterating just how busy the Doc was when he arrived. He greeted Lisa with a welcome smile, and while signing the referral form, gushed over Lisa's ability to have secured the services of such a well-known oncologist. "You must know some big people," he said.
I could go on but I think you get the point: it's not the cancer that needs coping with. The stress comes from resisting the urge to choke the bejesus out of those who've opted for a career in "health-care". I'm not proud to admit this but I've found myself wishing breast cancer upon snotty receptionists, thinking that maybe what they really need is to meet themselves as a patient in order to get the point.
As a wonderful footnote to all this angst, I was delighted with the way Lisa was admitted by the surgeons, the anesthesiologist and the RN's at VGH. They were, far and away, the kindest most professional of the lot. I'm hoping that as Prince George moves forward in developing it's own Cancer Clinic that some of the attitude we've witnessed in Vancouver can migrate north.
More later ...
Since her diagnosis, Lisa understood just how important having a "team" would be in her care. Literally, millions of words have been written in hundreds of books that speak to the importance of the team. However, despite all that literary effort the point is largely missed.
The team is important but not for the reasons you might think. The team is NOT important for coping with cancer. (Okay, settle down, I'm making a point.) Nope, dealing with the cancer is the easy part. The team is important for dealing with those who have chosen to work in the medical field. If you're a medical receptionist, read along, I have plenty of say and I don't really care much at this point about the security-guy at the end of the hallway.
Lisa has navigated this journey with amazing dignity and grace and, of course, with optimism. I admire this quality in her. I simply don't possess her tact in dealing with the dismissals of receptionists who have treated her as a nuisance rather than a person in need. Remember, Loni Anderson in WKRP? No platinum-blonde, high heels or emery board here. Just dis-interest.
Consider the following episodes:
** When Lisa was told that she had bilateral breast cancer, she was all alone. She entered the meeting feeling upbeat and positive because, a week before, the same Doc assured her that if the news wasn't positive he'd suggest that she bring someone along. When she received the call to review her pathology results, she felt good about things. After all, they hadn't suggested that she bring someone with her. What a setup! When she left the office, they comforted her by shaking their head and commenting about "how strong" she was. What a strong woman.
** Over the course of a few days, Lisa played a long-game of telephone tag with the oncologist in Vancouver who'd agreed to take her on as a patient. At one point, the receptionist told Lisa that "just because you've read the Doctor's book, you don't get a referral!". Demonstrating the same poise, Lisa secured the meeting-time that she sought and learned, along the way, that the young receptionist was a temp-employee! Apparently, in this business of medicine, there is an apprenticeship program in place and mastering rudeness is critical to securing full-time employment.
** Earlier the same month, Lisa met a PG-graduate from the same apprenticeship program working for her local Doc. All she needed was a signature on a referral form from her local Doc in PG in order to pave the way to see the oncologist in Vancouver. When she visited the Docs office the waiting room was empty. Lisa was told that she'd have to wait because the Doc was busy with patients. (Did I mention the waiting room was empty?) The receptionist then questioned the efficacy of the out-of-town referral because "we don't even know this Doctor" and was in the middle of reiterating just how busy the Doc was when he arrived. He greeted Lisa with a welcome smile, and while signing the referral form, gushed over Lisa's ability to have secured the services of such a well-known oncologist. "You must know some big people," he said.
I could go on but I think you get the point: it's not the cancer that needs coping with. The stress comes from resisting the urge to choke the bejesus out of those who've opted for a career in "health-care". I'm not proud to admit this but I've found myself wishing breast cancer upon snotty receptionists, thinking that maybe what they really need is to meet themselves as a patient in order to get the point.
As a wonderful footnote to all this angst, I was delighted with the way Lisa was admitted by the surgeons, the anesthesiologist and the RN's at VGH. They were, far and away, the kindest most professional of the lot. I'm hoping that as Prince George moves forward in developing it's own Cancer Clinic that some of the attitude we've witnessed in Vancouver can migrate north.
More later ...
Thursday, April 24, 2008
I AM HEADING OFF TO BED!
This is my bear Stitches. Jordyn named my new bear. This bear was given to me from my friend Bonita - her two boys also go to St.Mary's. Stitches is a breast cancer bear and people have been asking about her already. She will be with me in the hospital keeping watch over me.
I had my dye injections today. OUCH! The doctor gave me a needle close to the nipple and injected an radio active solution. Because it is a different ph level than our body chemistry - it stings. Oh yeah- it stings for a minute and slowly subsides! A real treat. THEN because I have bilateral cancer -we had to do it again in the other breast. LOVELY! I had to wait 30 minutes and then they took xrays for 30 minutes. The xrays showed that the dye had drained to the sentinel node. This way Dr. Davis will know where the sentinel node is and quickly remove it for a frozen biopsy tomorrow.
This is Norm and Chrissy dickin' around in the nuclear medicine centre showing their undivided attention through the whole process. Clowns!
I was able to talk with Jordyn tonight, which was a real treat. She was a little down in her boots. I'd love to hug her and kiss her fluffy cheeks right now.
I am off to bed. I will get up and have a bath for one last time with "the girls" at 4:00am.
Norm will take over the blog. From here on out - I will be TITS up. :)
ONE DAY MORE . . .
Ethan was a big help packing up my luggage yesterday. He wanted to empty it and jump in to use it like a car. He was also modelling some pink clothing some of you may wish to copy.
Shelley (my eldest sister) and her man, Ron, and Jordyn drove me to the airport. It was a continuation of the crying fest that started at home from saying good-bye to Rhonda and Ethan. Hugging Jordyn and reassuring her that everything will be fine ripped my heart out. I know everything will be fine, but the huge tears rolling off of her soft rounded cheeks was extremely heart wrenching for a mom. So I had THE largest headache when I boarded the plane. Then, because my head was stuffed up, my ears started to hurt. By the time I landed, I felt like I needles poke in my ear drums. OUCH!
As you can see above, Teresa Saunders, Chrissy, and Norm were there to greet me. Another crying jag . . . Chrissy and I embraced and cried for awhile. AND with Teresa, well, I just look at her and cry. What a calming, genuine, caring presence. We got it together and headed off to the NU restaurant. It was a great evening. All cameras were left at Chrissy's condo and so we missed some great photo opps. grrrrrr . . .
Teresa gave me some great decorating additions for my hospital bed - you'll have to wait and see. She is also going to have a fantastic pink outfit that I was able to choose last night. Also keep posted for that. Finally, she gave me some of her cards she has made with her impressive photography talent! VERY nice.
So today was a sleep in day. I have a 1:15 appointment at VGH to get the radio-active dye flushed into both breast. Tomorrow when Dr. Davis removes my breast tissue, she will see if the sentinel node has responded to the dye. She will do a frozen section right there to determine if the cancer has spread to the lymph nodes. If it has, she will remove the nodes and send them off pathology. Results take 2 weeks.
I still do not have the time of the surgery. I phoned VGH admissions and they just said "No mam, we do not give out that kind of information to the patients." Good God. When I find out, I will add a quick post.
Got to run and get ready for my dye job - heehee
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
TIME TO PACK!
Months ago the news went out that I would be having surgery. The bad news was waiting for April 25th to roll around. The good news is that I am in the best hands possible for this 10 hour surgery. The time is finally here to leave and packing is difficult. I will need a separate suitcase for all the books, magazines, puzzles, and healing gifts. Here's what I am talking about . . .
A medicine pouch made for me by one of my dear students, Glenda, whom I miss very much.
Puzzle and chocolates from "the box of plenty" given by Ken and Chrissy.
A basket of small gifts to choose from on those blah days from a dear cohort friend who has travelled this road triumphantly.
A medicine pouch made for me by one of my dear students, Glenda, whom I miss very much.
Puzzle and chocolates from "the box of plenty" given by Ken and Chrissy.
A plethora (yes I liked the 3 Amigos) of reading material from varied friends and family.
I could take pictures all night. I am so blessed and loved. In the book I received from Tracy Cole tonight (Chicken Soup edition pictured above), there is a chapter discussing: although this is a terrible time in your life, you will never feel so loved. That made me smile because it is oh so true. I feel such an outpouring of true genuine support and concern for myself and my family. How do I ever truly show my gratitude for all the love that has been shown to me? I guess all I can do is get better to thank everyone in person :)
Monday, April 21, 2008
NICE TO BE HOME!
Auntie Liana and Ethan have a heated debate over the shade of pink to be worn on Friday. Onlookers were not sure if a resolution was reached. Thoughts from last night . . .
Today was a long day. It is always tough to say goodbye to good friends at the best of times. The Pesls have been dear friends for eons. Liana grew up as part of our family; she found her hunky Czech man, Tom, and the rest is history. Their 3 wonderful kids have been a highlight in my life, as well as Jordyn's. Mackenzie, Tomas IV, and Kenndy are full of life, love, and inquiry. Their house is a home; all kids should be so lucky to grow up in such a family. I have always felt welcomed and loved there. So today I drove away with a lot of support and peace in my heart from them. I thank them for that. xoxo
The ride home was great. I listened to my "uncle" Burton Cummings cd, and I put on quite a concert in the vehicle. I was specTACular! :) Then we had to suck up Hanah Montana while Jordyn sang at the top of her lungs. The things we do for love. Now I know the extreme pain my parents endured as we played "Echo Beach" repeatedly on one summer trip back to Ontario. Yes, I did tell you that I have THE best parents!
Anyhow - we got home in time for more excitement for Jordyn . . . her new baby brother, Troy, was born. No, I didn't give birth while driving and singing a concert. I'm good, but not THAT good :) It's her half brother. Her father and his girlfriend welcomed their son into the world at 12:15 today. Jordyn was over the moon to go and meet him. Troy will be a great distraction and novelty for her during this time. She gets to see him after school tomorrow :)
So, I am off to give blood in the morning, clean the vehicle, do some laundry, meet with Cherie, have some Mirage with Bev and Becky, and pack yet again! I should also receive word of the time I am scheduled for surgery.
I'll keep you posted
COMING HOME!
It is time to head home to PG and get things ready for my Wednesday departure to Vancouver.
Above . . . . Jordyn puts on her poker face over dinner to conceal whether or not she enjoyed Ethan's 17 month birthday cake.
Rhonda and Ethan make their way to the vehicle for departure.
See you all at home!!!!
Bev and Becky . . . come on up for a final TIT farewell. :)
Sunday, April 20, 2008
BC WINES ARE INCREDIBLE!
The Burrowing Owl Winery was most magnificent. The restaurant was lovely and the scenery was fantastic. Mom, her friend Doreen, Rhonda, and I were on tour. We started at the Owl and then headed just down the road to Desert Hills for the Mirage. If anyone was at the wine tasting last fall in PG - you WILL remember that one! Lovely. We can't get the Mirage at home, but little Lisa will have a taste or two ready if you call :)
Saturday, April 19, 2008
OSOYOOS UPDATE
The pool in our hotel is closed, and so we headed next door to the Coast Inn to swim. It is a deluxe set up with a waterslide and hot tub. Jordyn was in heaven. Ethan wasn't too sure at first, but soon he warmed up and began splashing and goofing off. He drank a few drops and had a great time.
I had a chance to have a few private words with my parents. Because my chest has been bothering me so much lately, I feel like I could be in trouble next Friday. I have had a great life and one that has been so blessed. I am not afraid to die, and I can say that with conviction. I have had a FANTASTIC childhood; I have THE greatest parents, wonderful siblings, a beautiful daughter, healthy friendships, and an adoring love of my life . . . wow - need I say more? Who can say the same?
Dad just piped up and said that it wasn't my time to leave. He said that no one can take hope away and that I was just beginning my new journey to reveal a new me. Mom was also very sure that I have another 40 years to go - Nonna said so. :)
I did not sense a cover-up or parental "pump-up" going on. Both were convinced that I am here to stay folks. So . . . how do you like those apples? I felt a calm rush come over me.
I had a great sleep. Jordyn was complaining about my snoring. I guess I that was the chat I needed. The BIG GUY works in mysterious ways :)
Friday, April 18, 2008
IN HOT AND SUNNY OSOYOOS !
Ethan waiting at the Kelowna airport.
Jordyn arrives!
The bellhops at the
hotel in Osoyoos.
Last night was family night. We had a great MJ (mom)meal and some great wine. For those of you who KNOW how gourmet mom's meals are, you'll be salivating right now. Yummy! The rest of the night was full of travel chatter and catching up.
Then it was off to bed. I have been demoted to the kids room, which has a bunk bed. Good Lord! Jordyn had to sleep with me and so we squeezed into the bottom bunk. Hot and stuffy,but we were together and she fell asleep with a big smile on her pie face.
I stared at her for awhile and kissed her fluffy cheek. That angel image is seared in my memory and will be one that I draw upon as I head into the next phase of the battle. I have great reason to fight. :)
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Off to Osoyoos
So, today Norm got off to PG. We were even at the airport early! :)After he boarded, I went back for breakfast with the Pesls, and then headed to the airport to get Jordyn and uncle Chris. Ethan was not happy to have to say good bye to the Kelowna hospitality. We were then off to Osoyoos. BTW: Nicole Hamel- I am going to do a sampling of people to see who says "Oh SUE yus" or the PG - "OH SOY USE" I'll let you know how the sampling goes. I know I am not a native of the town as you are - but I think you have it wrong . heehee
I am so excited with the Power of Pink happening on the 25th! Norm bought boxers, a pink t-shirt, and a great team captain pink striped dress shirt. Yes, real men do wear pink! School staffs, students, families, working folks etc are all wearing pink - maybe not ALL pink - but a stripe, polka dot etc works!!! Pink it up gang!
I can't wait to see the photos. If you can't post, forward me your photos @:
lisa097@gmail.com. I'll post them as they come in.
Cheers,
Lisa xoxo
DELAYED IN KELOWNA
I am supposed to be off to Osoyoos to have a visit with my parents. They are there for some good golfing and winery tours. Anyhow, the person flying with Norm was unable to to make the flight this morning and hence the delay. So yippee for me, but crappy for Norm and business! AND crappy for the Burrowing Owl delay.Norm and I will get an extra day together - shopping and walking in city park. This trip just gets better and better. :)
So - no profound thoughts for now . . . and health wise I am doing okay. Actually - to be honest, my chest hurts (sternum). I am keeping busy and trying not to think about this.
Good news story to add: Mackenzie asked her school principal if they could have PINK day on April 25th and guess what? It's a go!!! The entire elementary school will be in pink for the cause. WOW!
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
STILL IN KELOWNA
I am still in Kelowna enjoying good friends, good wine, and good weather!I will just post a few more pictures . . .
Monday, April 14, 2008
CONFIRMATION SUNDAY!
Yesterday was an enjoyable day. I was the Confirmation sponsor for my niece, Mackenzie. In the Catholic church, this is one of seven holy sacraments, and to be asked to guide a young person in their journey is a tremendous responsiblitiy and great honor.Liana (family/girlfriend, and Mackenzie's mother) hosted a lovely champagne and cake reception at the house from 2 -4. It was a great time. It was nice to catch up with Kelowna folks who I have have not seen for a while.
The ceremony was at 7:30pm and the newly appointed bishop of this diocese officiated. It was quite a spectatcular event. I have a few ideas for St. Mary's - watch out! :)
Anyhow - late evening after the reception . . . Liana has now taken the kids to school, Norm and Tom (Liana's husband) have gone to work, and she and I will get the day together! Yippee skippee . . .
I must go . . . 
a walk awaits! (I'll add some more photos later)
a walk awaits! (I'll add some more photos later)
Saturday, April 12, 2008
The Grand!
I am in Kelowna for a few days. I will be a confirmation sponsor for my niece Mackenzie tomorrow evening. I'll post some photos Monday.
Norm and I are staying at the Grand and having a great time! The hotel is in a wonderful waterfront location;the construction taking place around the hotel is very impressive. Unfortunately, the service is poor and so is the food. For being the known as a top hotel - it desperately needs some updating.
At any rate, we are having a fantastic time just being. We went for a jog on the waterfront this morning, and then walked about downtown - poking around in the stores. Later, we took little miss Mackenzie to the Cactus Club for dinner and then headed to the confirmation practice.
I am enjoying the relaxing atmosphere. It's good to get away and be in tourist mode. For me . . . it is the best medicine!
Norm and I are staying at the Grand and having a great time! The hotel is in a wonderful waterfront location;the construction taking place around the hotel is very impressive. Unfortunately, the service is poor and so is the food. For being the known as a top hotel - it desperately needs some updating.
At any rate, we are having a fantastic time just being. We went for a jog on the waterfront this morning, and then walked about downtown - poking around in the stores. Later, we took little miss Mackenzie to the Cactus Club for dinner and then headed to the confirmation practice.
I am enjoying the relaxing atmosphere. It's good to get away and be in tourist mode. For me . . . it is the best medicine!
Friday, April 11, 2008
Who ARE the TIT's???
In a few postings I have mentioned the TIT's. Many of you know of this gal pal group . . . but sadly, some readers are in the dark. So inquiring minds ... allow me to introduce my friends:
The TIT's = Together In Time
The TIT's = Together In TimeMembers: (r - l)
Rhonda Gilbert (Wanna, my sister), Becky Easton (Lovah), Bev Thomson (Beeve butts), Chris Held (Frissy), and moi
In the mid 90’s, I would get together with four girlfriends for an annual autumn get-away to Stellako Lodge. We would always have a theme for this September weekend i.e tacky tourist, wedding veils, ladies of the night etc and enjoy some good red wine. Of course, we would also book in to enjoy a Saturday dinner prepared by the European chef and owner. On Sunday we would end with plans from our mocking Annual General Meeting.
One weekend, we were hosting our annual AGM , and we struck it rich on a scratch and win. Yes - $100 dollars. WOW! We immediately voted Chrissy to be our treasurer, and she invested what money we could raise. To boost the account, we sold Robert Held Art glass. Sales took off and so did we. Our first TIT trip was in 2001 to Chrissy’s condo in Maui. That trip gave us the travel bug. We have since had 2 luxurious all-expenses paid trips to Italy. These trips are designed by princess Chrissy; the experience and accommodations are 5 star all the way! It is quite the surreal experience!
One weekend, we were hosting our annual AGM , and we struck it rich on a scratch and win. Yes - $100 dollars. WOW! We immediately voted Chrissy to be our treasurer, and she invested what money we could raise. To boost the account, we sold Robert Held Art glass. Sales took off and so did we. Our first TIT trip was in 2001 to Chrissy’s condo in Maui. That trip gave us the travel bug. We have since had 2 luxurious all-expenses paid trips to Italy. These trips are designed by princess Chrissy; the experience and accommodations are 5 star all the way! It is quite the surreal experience!
It is not often that 5 women can bond, travel, and remain close friends. No one is in competition, no one is high maintenance, no one is demanding, and no one is controlling. We just are. Each brings a special something to the mix that makes our fivesome a truly unique group.
I am proud to be a TIT and honoured to have this unique bond with four other strong, incredible women.
I am proud to be a TIT and honoured to have this unique bond with four other strong, incredible women.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
How Is Jordyn?
I was asked how my daughter, Jordyn, is doing with "all of this" several times today. The truth is . . . I don't know. She is tremendously sensitive and internalizes a lot. Her questions, comments, and emotions have come out in sporadic bits and pieces.When I first told her that the doctors had found some cancer bugs in my right breast , a large crocodile tear rolled down her cheek and she immediately asked me if I was going to die. After I assured that I was not, she asked if I would have to be in hospital. When I said I probably would, she asked if she could have my jello from the hospital dinner tray. Out of the mouths of babes!
When the diagnosis changed, we had another chat. She was very sad that the very "boob-a-lavage" that had fed her when she was little, would have to go. She insisted on being a part of choosing new breasts. She saw the options for reconstruction and voted for implants. The reason for this was because it is the quickest surgery, other than having no reconstruction.
After I returned from Vancouver, I told her of the decision to have the DIEP. We reviewed the surgery in grade 3 terms and left it at that. She was satisfied. She was also satisfied that auntie Chrissy would be taking care of me in Vancouver. This is because, "Auntie Chrissy is 39 yrs old and so she's old enough to do a good job." What a kid! Chris was flattered with the age! 39 again?!! heehee
Last week she cried, for the first time, that I have seen . Not a tear- full cry. She said it was because she was worried something would happen in the operating room. I told her that I had not one, but four specialists working on me and they would not let any thing happen. She replied, "No one knows for sure except God." Man, how do you reply to that? My eight year old daughter was suddenly 28!
She volunteered for the countdown picture today. My girlfriend, Cherie, kindly picked her up from school today for me. Nice break! Anyhow, Cherie has the cool car and Missy Jordyn is a total car hound . . . she has been since birth! She can sit in a car and play imaginary games like no one I have ever seen. So when she was able to also have a photo shoot from the car - she was totally stoked!
Jordyn is fortunate to have a network of people to talk with. She talks with auntie Rhonda from the heart, l'uncle when she has philisophical questions, and she lets out emotions with grandma and poppa. She can talk to her auntie Shelley and thinks the world of her two older cousins, Matt and Mike. I have a network of girlfriends who also watch for her. In addition to her little friends from school, she also has a special, mature friendship with her dad's former partner, Joni. She has been in Jordyn's life since Jordyn was a baby; the two share a special bond, and for that I am grateful.
Jordyn has experienced her share of sadness and loss in her young life. I am so happy that she has so many healthy, strong, and grounded individuals concerned for her well being. She is such a great kid, and a very lucky little girl to be truly loved by so many people. Because of the quality of people in her life, I do know that . . . she will be just fine!
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Realistic Treatment Timeline!
Bilateral breast cancer was not my initial diagnosis. I was told I had Ductal Carcinoma in situ (DCIS) in my right breast. This is the fastest growing breast cancer. The cells are contained in the ducts and are even referred to as precancerous. The survival rate is extremely high. I could deal with that . . . but I wanted to be treated asap.
One month later I had the needle biopsy on the ductal carcinoma. The surgeon in PG tried to clear the margins on my right breast and then thought he would remove an annoying lump in my left breast. I had complained about this lump since August. I had 2 mammograms and 2 ultra sounds on the left breast but was told that it was likely a calcified lump from breast feeding. After all, "breast cancer doesn't hurt" - false!
The results of that surgery proved to be alarming. Weeks later I was called in and told the news. The ductal cancer had moved into the lobes and the cells had become comedo cells. The cancer stage moved from 0 to 2. In my left breast, the calcified lump was an invasive tumor, and it was stage 2/3. Yikes! How far it has invaded will be determined on the 25th.
From the beginning, and especially at this point, I wish that I had the following resource:
http://www.breastcancernavigationmap.com/
This is an awesome interactive resource of what to expect in terms of a treatment timeline. It alleviates stress and allows the survivor to prepare for the next step. Not everything is done in the timeline one would expect.
A hardcopy of this is available in every breast cancer kit. Upon diagnosis - MAKE SURE to get your kit. I was not given mine until 2 months later. I was extremely frustrated with, what I felt to be, poor medical attention. If I had this kit - I would have relaxed and used my energies productively.
One month later I had the needle biopsy on the ductal carcinoma. The surgeon in PG tried to clear the margins on my right breast and then thought he would remove an annoying lump in my left breast. I had complained about this lump since August. I had 2 mammograms and 2 ultra sounds on the left breast but was told that it was likely a calcified lump from breast feeding. After all, "breast cancer doesn't hurt" - false!
The results of that surgery proved to be alarming. Weeks later I was called in and told the news. The ductal cancer had moved into the lobes and the cells had become comedo cells. The cancer stage moved from 0 to 2. In my left breast, the calcified lump was an invasive tumor, and it was stage 2/3. Yikes! How far it has invaded will be determined on the 25th.
From the beginning, and especially at this point, I wish that I had the following resource:
http://www.breastcancernavigationmap.com/
This is an awesome interactive resource of what to expect in terms of a treatment timeline. It alleviates stress and allows the survivor to prepare for the next step. Not everything is done in the timeline one would expect.
A hardcopy of this is available in every breast cancer kit. Upon diagnosis - MAKE SURE to get your kit. I was not given mine until 2 months later. I was extremely frustrated with, what I felt to be, poor medical attention. If I had this kit - I would have relaxed and used my energies productively.
Monday, April 7, 2008
Why I Have Chosen the DIEP Reconstruction Option
DIEP -Deep Inferior Epigastric Perferator
After receiving the surprising news that I had bilateral cancer, I had a few weeks before seeing my oncologist, Karen Gelmon at the BC Cancer Agency, to research some options. When I finally met with Karen, she confirmed that I had the following choices:
a) Clear the cancer and create positive margins - live with whatever breast tissue was left
b) Double mastectomy and no reconstruction
c) Double mastectomy and implants
d) Double mastectomy and delayed reconstruction (after treatment)
e) Double mastectomy and reconstruction (with my own tissue) at the same time
The sentinel node indicator will dictate subsequent treatment: chemo, hormone, and/or radiation.
My choice was easy - to have a double mastectomy and reconstruction with my tissue at the same time. I would rather have one operation and be done with operations in one fell swoop. I have too much living to do!!
I returned home and researched various options of reconstruction using your own tissue. In these surgeries, the tummy, buttocks, back, or thigh can be used as the donor site. The tummy is the most successful because of the strong blood supply.
Once I had decide on the donor site, I looked at the varied TRAM flap options which had been suggested to me at the BCCA. This research alarmed me. The TRAM (transverse rectus abdominal muscle) options use the entire transverse muscle and leave the patient with little, if any, stomach muscle. Not a chance! Who would choose that?
I then came upon the DIEP option. A recent option - MUCH better. It is the same as the TRAM flap BUT the muscle is left intact. The blood supply is microscopically taken from the tram and attached to the mammary artery in the breast pocket. I decided then that if my plastic surgeon was unable to perform the newer DIEP - I was opting for implants at a later date.
Upon meeting the plastic surgeon, (who looked 12 years old), she informed me that the DIEP is her specialty. She has performed 100's of them both in Canada and the US. We reviewed all options again and then the DIEP procedure in depth. The answer was clear. I am a DIEP girl!
Right now I am harvesting my "muffin top" or as Laura Hansen would say, my "nuclear explosion". My belly will become my boobs :) Yippee Skippee!
I HIGHLY recommend watching the operation via Beth Israel hospital in New York.
Ladies - the doctors are cuties! (added viewing feature)
The DIEP webcast:
http://www.or-live.com/bethisrael/1896/event/rnh.cfm?
This way, you will understand the updates that will be posted by Norm on the 25th.
If you have a weak tummy - fast forward and freeze frame the surgery. It is very informative and all your burning questions are answered.
After receiving the surprising news that I had bilateral cancer, I had a few weeks before seeing my oncologist, Karen Gelmon at the BC Cancer Agency, to research some options. When I finally met with Karen, she confirmed that I had the following choices:
a) Clear the cancer and create positive margins - live with whatever breast tissue was left
b) Double mastectomy and no reconstruction
c) Double mastectomy and implants
d) Double mastectomy and delayed reconstruction (after treatment)
e) Double mastectomy and reconstruction (with my own tissue) at the same time
The sentinel node indicator will dictate subsequent treatment: chemo, hormone, and/or radiation.
My choice was easy - to have a double mastectomy and reconstruction with my tissue at the same time. I would rather have one operation and be done with operations in one fell swoop. I have too much living to do!!
I returned home and researched various options of reconstruction using your own tissue. In these surgeries, the tummy, buttocks, back, or thigh can be used as the donor site. The tummy is the most successful because of the strong blood supply.
Once I had decide on the donor site, I looked at the varied TRAM flap options which had been suggested to me at the BCCA. This research alarmed me. The TRAM (transverse rectus abdominal muscle) options use the entire transverse muscle and leave the patient with little, if any, stomach muscle. Not a chance! Who would choose that?
I then came upon the DIEP option. A recent option - MUCH better. It is the same as the TRAM flap BUT the muscle is left intact. The blood supply is microscopically taken from the tram and attached to the mammary artery in the breast pocket. I decided then that if my plastic surgeon was unable to perform the newer DIEP - I was opting for implants at a later date.
Upon meeting the plastic surgeon, (who looked 12 years old), she informed me that the DIEP is her specialty. She has performed 100's of them both in Canada and the US. We reviewed all options again and then the DIEP procedure in depth. The answer was clear. I am a DIEP girl!
Right now I am harvesting my "muffin top" or as Laura Hansen would say, my "nuclear explosion". My belly will become my boobs :) Yippee Skippee!
I HIGHLY recommend watching the operation via Beth Israel hospital in New York.
Ladies - the doctors are cuties! (added viewing feature)
The DIEP webcast:
http://www.or-live.com/bethisrael/1896/event/rnh.cfm?
This way, you will understand the updates that will be posted by Norm on the 25th.
If you have a weak tummy - fast forward and freeze frame the surgery. It is very informative and all your burning questions are answered.
Cheers . . .
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Sunday Flippin Hike!!!
Sunday is suppose to be a day of leisure. Ha!Norm, his son Griffin, Jordyn, and I decided to be adventurous and see what the infamous flood had done with Cottonwood Island park. Well, a nice little "walk" turned into a game of Survivor. Good Lord.
We stayed on the slush trail and then attempted to walk the rocky river bed. Sadly, every bridge had been destoyed and the trails were covered with snow! The only way to the river bed was to scale down the muddy slopes and balance on logs. Cottonwoods had been toppled everywhere; my days of yearning to be Nadia Comaneci came in handy. Head up - shoulders back - and you'll never fall off a beam. Handy tip folks!
EVENTUALLY we scrambled up the mudbanks and slushed back to the vehicle. Grrrrr . . . my Mizuno runners were ruined. I was so disappointed that we had to drive right to Dairy Queen to cool down with a peanut buster parfait. 
THAT made things SO much better :) All is right in the world again!It is so nice to have the love of children and a loving partner to help me forget
. . . if only for a day!
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